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THE SOCKLAND POST

Hard-Hitting Headlines. Soft-Fabric Sources.

In a groundbreaking act of whimsy, the sock citizens of Sockland have launched a wonderful series on YouTube: Sock Puppet Whimsical Wonders.

The show follows the misadventures, musical numbers, and mild arguments of various puppets as they explore life, friendship, and shiny objects. Viewership is rising steadily, especially among those with excellent taste and short attention spans.

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Meanwhile, Sockland's official website has been undergoing mysterious changes -- sources report strange buttons, secret messages, and rumors of upcoming sock-themed games. One local puppet declared, "I clicked a button and confetti fell. This is the future."

Monday

Button Shortage Rocks East Sockland

East Sockland is in turmoil after a button shipment was not able to make it on time. Locals are sewing eyes from old coins and bottle caps. "I can't see, but I feel fabulous," says resident sock Glenda Crumb

Tuesday

Yarn Friend Elected Mayor Again

Despite not campaigning or speaking, Yarn Friend has won his third term as mayor. "He's calm. He's fuzzy, He never yells," says one voter. Opponent Woolrich was unavailable for comment.

Wednesday

Sock Declares Independence from Drawer

Fed up with cramped conditions and dust bunnies, a lone sock has declared itself "Drawer-Free." Now living in a shoebox under the bed, they say it's lonely but liberating. Their flag is a toothpick taped to a tissue paper.